Characters: Kyuhyun, Heechul, Yesung, Siwon, Donghae, Hangeng, Eunhyuk other SJ members might join in soon
Pairings: KyuChul, YeWook, past!HanChul, KyuSung_friendship, SiChul_friendship, Kihae and more to come soon
Genre: AU, Supernatural, Drama, Angst
Word Count : 1,933
Warning : Character death, ghostly apparitions?
Disclaimer : I own many things, but unfortunately Super Junior isn't one of them.
After the whole ‘ghost’ incident with Heechul, Kyuhyun thought he would be free from all of the craziness and go back to his normal life as a university student. But when he starts to hear whispers again, nothing is as he expects...especially when so much more is at stake this time.
Listen (Part 1) - in Masterlist
Prologue | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5
Ryeowook shifted his feet uncomfortably as he stood outside the apartment door. His free hand curled into a fist as he raised it up against the familiar dark wooden door, feeling his insides struggle and writhe in knots. His other hand was sweating frigidly despite the snowy weather outside, holding on to a bag bearing a canister of hot and steaming toppoki. His sweater and red scarf felt slightly damp from the melting snow from outside.
He was about to just leave the bag outside the door without even a note, feeling of nagging regret and frustration coursing in him for even thinking of coming over. Jongwoon was a good person, maybe too good even. And Ryeowook had nothing to offer him. He wished the other knew and would stop wasting time on him.
Out of a sudden impulse and emotions clogging his rationale, he had thrown the apron at the chef’s feet after being scolded for the third time this week for messing up the orders, making three full servings of expensive steak which no one ordered. After the victorious moment of strutting out of the restaurant, his heart was sunk with regret. What was he going to do now that he had lost the job his mother had died fighting for him? Everything had been a mess lately; but then thinking back, his life had been nothing but a mess. All his life he had been nothing but a burden. First to his mother, and then Heechul-hyung. Now it’s Jongwoon.
But what he didn’t expect was a call the next day from the kind waitress noona who happily informed him to come back, that the head chef was willing to take him back if he apologized and worked harder. He almost instantly said yes and thanked her over and over again, thinking that it was her and the crew who had helped him get his job back but was surprised when she said that it was a certain male friend of his who had begged the head chef for a second chance for Ryeowook. It didn’t take him very long to figure that it was Yesung.
He closed his eyes momentarily and was about to turn away after leaving the bag of food by the door, hoping that the man would get a good portion of it before it gets discovered by Kyuhyun-ssi, (who always seemed to be a fan of his cooking and apparently had a big, healthy appetite) but a sudden sound of rustling and rapid sniffing came from under the door. His eyes lit up as his heart skipped a beat; oh how he had missed the little fellow but knew he had to leave before someone comes.
“Ddaming-ah, who is it?”
The familiar voice that sounded strangely deep and hoarse rang through the door, no longer soulful like it used to be. Ryeowook had forgotten how long it had been since he last saw the older boy with frizzy hair. What was wrong his voice? Had he fallen sick? Why did he not taken care of himself? Worried little voices rang in his head frantically. He was about to walk away quickly before the door swung open.
“Ryeowook-ssi!” The small-eyed man cried out as Ryeowook quickened his steps along the corridor, biting his lips as he left. He could feel Ddaming rushing out and bouncing excitedly after his heels, looking bigger and healthier than before; he knew he had left the dog in good hands. The smaller dog no longer needs to feel like her life was a burden like before.
“Ryeowook-ah…don’t go!” Jongwoon said between coughs, threatening to rip his throat apart. “Ryeowook-ah!” He had wanted to chase after the smaller-framed man, but the feeling of his lungs squeezing through the tight-space that was his chest didn’t allow him.
The elevator door opened but Ryeowook didn’t step inside. Instead he crouched down and scooped the dog up who licked at his face excessively, and then turned back into the corridor. “Wook-ah…!” Yesung shuddered violently while coughing into his own fist, eyes and mouth all scrunched-up in an ugly bunch. Tears squeezed out from the turmoil lingered by the side of his eyes, blurring his vision but a sudden rush of real ones came when the smaller boy practically rammed into his chest, hugging him tightly, hands around his neck.
“Why so stupid?” Jongwoon was surprised by the sudden outcry as another cough squeezed through his mouth tiredly.
“Why so stupid?” Ryeowook asked again forcefully. “That head chef’s a jerk. How could you allow him to push you around, washing hundreds of dishes with cold freezing water outside in the back alley, without even a scarf or a sweater! Why so stupid? Why so stupidly do it? For me?”
Yesung had wanted to speak up but the boy was squeezing him even harder, not allowing him to even breathe properly. Ddaming was practically dancing on two legs below them. “No one made me feel like I was worth anything. No one except my mother, no one except Heechul-hyung, and no one, even more…except you! Why do you all waste your time on me? My father never even wanted me in the first place! Why?”
“Kim Ryeowook...There’s no reason for anything I do for you, you understand? I just do and will still…always,” Yesung managed to say from the tight squeeze, he could feel all the air emptying from his chest as well, head feeling so much lighter than it should.
Ryeowook tightened his arms around the man’s back, warmth diffusing back and forth between the two of them. His mother had fought against his father and died for him, Heechul-hyung gave him a roof over his head when he didn’t even had socks on his toes, and Jongwoon gave him reasons to find himself back again. He was a burden to these people, yes, but they never felt that he was a heavy one. Why ruin himself over this and waste their efforts for just one person?
“You can let go of me now, Ryeowook-ah…I can’t b-breathe,” Jongwoon nearly collapsed when the small boy finally let go of him. Suddenly it felt like a mountain being lifted off the chest, for the both of them. Ryeowook’s heart gave a pang of guilt when his eyes trailed the tired lines on the man’s sickly face.
“I’m sorry, I should’ve told you. Yesung-hyung…can you accompany me to somewhere tomorrow?” Ryeowook said in a quiet voice.
Yesung nodded softly in return as the both of them stumbled into the apartment, not a second without body contact as they salvaged every bit of warmth they could get from each other, with little Ddaming carelessly locked outside for a whole five minutes with the forgotten toppoki.
“Hyung, your hands…they’re smaller than mine…” Ryeowook said bewilderedly through quiet tears, spreading his palm and fingers shakily onto the other’s.
“But they fit.” Jongwoon’s smaller hand closed in on the spaces between their fingers.
His heart didn’t feel like it was heaving a dead weight in his chest like how it had for the longest time. He actually tasted the slightest hint of happiness in his mouth, something he had almost promised to stay off. The sun was shining brightly but it wasn’t hot; autumn, his favourite season. He was at the park.
He wasn’t alone; someone was crouched down beside him on a nice grassy patch under the nice shade of a big tree. The sound of birds chirping and quiet chatter filled the air. It felt nice.
“Heechullie, give me your hand. But close your eyes first…”
He looked at her with wide and curious eyes, clamping them shut before extending at arm towards her; fingers brown at the tips from playing with dirt.
“Don’t peek, okay?” The voice was soft and so familiar. Heechul felt something small with edges fall into his palm before opening his eyes.
“It’s a flower again! But I’m a boy!” he exclaimed, peering at it with slight disgust. “Who says boys can’t like flowers? Heechul-ah, be who you want to be, okay?” A warm smiled formed on the soft pink lips, long hair with straight bangs framed the small delicate face.
The soft rustling of grass, silent footsteps, and the smell of something horrible wafted before a giant hand clasped over his face. He was screaming silently but no sound escaped. He thought he felt his throat break but it couldn’t stop her from falling limp in their hands. His head lolled to one side before darkness swallowed them whole, his tiny hands still clutching onto the pink paper sakura tightly. White fell all around him suddenly; it wasn’t autumn after all…It was winter.
“Wake up, Heechul, wake up…”
He stirred before a ray of sunlight hit his face, forcing his to shut his eyes tightly again, feeling the beads of sweat on his forehead. His old friend of a nightmare had come back again. He groaned and rubbed his eyes slowly with one hand before opening them again. The outline of a blurry figure stood before him, one hand perched at the hip, the other shaking his shoulders slightly.
“Yah, if you don’t wake up we won’t get to go to the theme park again. It’s going to be really crowded if we don’t make it in time. Yah, wake up!” The smell of something fragrant filled his nose…something delicious and homey. Something like…Beijing Fried Rice.
A finger poked into his cheek gently. His eyelids flew open before he quickly caught it in his hand.
“Aish, pabo. I made breakfast. Your brother is waiting like a five-year-old outside. He’s going to break the plates if you don’t wake up any sooner.” The figure was about to turn before he pulled the finger towards himself, making the other stumble into the tangle of bed sheet.
“Yah, I still need to make juice!”
The same handsome face, so gentle and kind; conveying unsaid words only he could understand and hunger for…the same adorable voice slurred by a soft accent. He felt his eyes sting suddenly.
“Zen me le? What’s wrong, Heechul? Did you dream about your noona again?”
Something was ticking beside his ear. His heart sank with realization, trying to take in the details as much as he could. He knew this wasn’t real too, but he quickly squeezed the china man really tightly in a hug before it all trickled away like sand, like so many times before…Always too good to be true.
“I miss you,” he managed to mumble, watching as the face faded away into the dark abyss below.
“Don’t let go, don’t let go…”
He was holding onto someone’s arm from above. He didn’t want to let go even if his arm hurt. But he didn’t know why. The one below had nothing to do with him, but he just didn’t want to let go. The fibres of his arm were twisting to a loose, he can’t hold on much longer but he can’t let anyone slip through his fingers again, not this time. Not anymore. He tugged and pulled the dead weight before falling backwards into nothingness.
He opened his eyes; finally for real this time.
Darkness and the sound of his alarm clock ticking so annoyingly surrounded him. It was still dark and foggy outside with the soft glow of moonlight streaming through his drawn curtains. No pink paper flowers or fried rice for breakfast were waiting for him. He shuddered to himself in the frigid night, feeling so alone in the whole wide world suddenly.